Instead of writing a little paragraph telling you I’m a copy-editor at Essentials magazine, mommy, wife, writer, wine-lover, handbag hoarder and blogger, I’ve compiled a list of facts about myself that will give you a sneak peek into who I am.
• I have a phobia of coral – if coral polyps break off in your leg they continue to grow forever and ever and ever.
• The Boomtown Rat’s ‘I don’t like Mondays’ is my favourite song. I can’t think of a better reason.
• I LOVE CHOCOLATE. You can have chocolate bars, chocolate cake, chocolate icing, chocolate biscuits, chocolate ice-cream, chocolate milkshakes…
• When I was little and lived in Estcourt, my brother and I had a tree called the ‘Knightrider Tree Car House’. The name says it all. Children are not all that subtle when it comes to naming things. Like the vomit ball tree.
• My ultimate holiday destination is the Artic. I have to see the Northern Lights before I buy the farm.
• I have recently come to fear that I am addicted to reading. If I don’t have a book, I feel panicky. If I’m reading a good book it’s all I think about.
• My dream job is to be a game ranger. I would settle for being a farmer’s wife. Or a sloth – they’re beautiful.
• I am unable to sleep if my face, hands and feet are not clean. I am also unable to put hand cream on unless I have just washed my hands. It just makes mud.
• Hairs gross me out. Animal hairs are fine but human hairs make me want to varmint. Especially in food. When they get stuck in the food and you half swallow them. Bllaaagh.
• I love stationery. I can go beserko in a stationary shop: pens, paper, cardboard, plastic sleeves, colouring-in pencils. You should see my desk drawers.
• I have a great fear that one day I will wake up and realise that I’m completely ordinary. In every way. What a waste.
• I think cows are the most beautiful animals on the planet.
• Once I have watched a movie, I cannot for the life of me remember what it was about. Even five minutes afterwards.
• When I was small I used to ride horses, do ballet, modern dancing, acrobatics and gymnastics. I wanted to marry McGyver.
• I wish I could draw or paint. I can’t – I suck so badly in this department that people laugh openly at my attempts to illustrate the most banal of objects. It does not hurt my feelings. I know I am terrible.
• People walking into things makes me laugh out loud.
• My favourite movies of all time are: The Rocky Horror Picture Show, Ferris Bueller’s Day Off, Back to the Future 1, 2 and 3.
• My first car was bought for R5 000 and she was a metallic pink Beetle called Delilah. I cried when I sold her and got Angus. I now have a car called Seamus O’Hanahan.
• Our dog Jimmy used to have a bed called Fernando.
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